Reaching Out.

The past few months have been rough for me. I was made redundant and out of a job in October. Things like this I take personally even though I know it was probably just a business decision I still wonder what I did wrong and what I could have changed. It still hurts and I'm fighting to move past it. My beautiful husband has taken on a higher role at his work meaning much more responsibility and more stressful days for him. He is working super hard to learn and manage much more than one person possibly can.

 In particular this past week or two has been really hard, on reflection I understand more of what was going on. I found an amazing position advertised, I applied and got an interview. Everything felt right, it felt good and I kept constantly reminding myself that it might not happen but it didn't stop my mind from wandering on the possibilities. I received the dreaded email that I really was not expecting, I didn't get the job. I have coped well with every other knock back or not being contacted at all. This one hit hard and left me shattered. The following few days I fought and picked myself up as best I could knowing I just had to keep looking and I did.

This week I just found that wall I'd hit was just too hard to punch through. It was one wall too many. During those few days I felt so alone and worthless. I felt a burden on everyone and everything around me and no one wanted me anyway. I knew none of it was true but believing things is sometimes really hard without a bit of help.

Some of you saw part of the spiral, a kind few helped pull me out of the darkness when I had no idea how to help myself. They reminded me that I'm not alone, it's not easy to find work and I very much deserved all the hugs that were sent. To those people, thank you. Thank you for picking me up, for just being with me and talking to me. Thank you for challenging my thoughts and helping me break down that wall, I could not have done it without any of you.

I'm sure someone by now, if they made it this far, is wondering why I am sharing all this?! It's really hard for me to share anything, I'm a very private person and I rarely even let my parents into a lot of things. I wanted to share because I wanted to show the good in the world. I wanted to reflect and help myself to heal a bit. I wanted to thank the people that reached when I was alone and needed it most. I wanted to make sure no one else ever feels alone, you are beautiful and very wanted in this world. I wanted to remind myself, I'm not weak or crazy or broken, I'm human.

A Weight Loss Journey

It has been some time since I posted, life has very much been busy and quite frankly, a rollercoaster of ups and downs.

In March, on my doctors advice and with his help, I am working on

Six Point Zero Point Two.

We have had the pre-patch now for about a week. Seeing as though servers are down I thought I would take the opportunity to write what I have been up to and where we are headed in the next few weeks.

So it has been a while..

Its has been a while since I blogged, almost a whole year in fact and what a year it has been!

My First Blizzcon.

I had yet to experience a Blizzcon that is until last weekend. I had no idea what I was in for really so I read on twitter and websites and other blogs to see what was happening.

I bought the virtual ticket not long after the in game rewards were announced, Moo suggested I but it on my account to get Murkalot, so I did! About 2 weeks before I was getting just a little excited, Moo and I decided that it would be impossible to watch anything with the kids around so it sleepover time for them! We arranged for them to pay a visit to Nanna and Poppy for the weekend and we would camp on the lounge. Moo with his IT background and being the tinkerer he is, set up my laptop via HDMI so we could watch it on the tele. I even played WoW a few times before the weekend, just to test it of course! :P
So kids are sorted, big screen viewing sorted it was onto food for the day! On the Friday night on the way home we did a grocery shop for snacks and of course alcohol to indulge in.

Come Saturday morning we are out of bed at 5:30am to turn everything on and log in to my account. It all works like a charm and so begins the opening ceremony! We got to watch most of it uninterrupted as the kids decided it was a good morning to sleep in! /cheer

Nearing 9am and I had the kids fed and packed ready to go, it was about 15 mins before the end of opening ceremony that Moo dashed off with kids while I got to work! Moved the couch to prime viewing position, cleared and moved the coffee table to house food and drinks and prepared the first round of snacks.

On Moos return I made us brekky and we parked on the couch (ipad in hand) for the next panel which is pretty much where we stayed all day, pottering between the kitchen, bathroom and lounge all day. I found it so exciting hearing about all the new things coming and just absorbing all the information that was being given, new games, new expansions and enhancements! I kept thinking how awesome it would be to be right there hearing and seeing and being completely submersed in it all. Moo had his laptop set up for the ATA podcast stream which he was jumping in and out of all day, it was weird hearing on side of a 4 way conversation and seeing random things popping up in the chat room, when I could see it, but it was so fun!

Saturday afternoon, after Blizzcon had finished for the day, we had a lovely chat with Leeta from Behind the Avatar. It was great fun speaking to someone I have been following for so long on twitter who is also a fellow Aussie with a podcast, there aren’t many around! If you want to listen to the interview you can get it here.

Sunday began early, 5am to be precise! Much coffee was consumed in an effort to wake up just a little. It didn’t take long before I was back to being in awe and totally consumed by what was going on both in twitterland and on my tele. Just amazing watching the Q&A Panel and the details of the next expansion and amazed by the costumes the cosplayers had made. I also loved seeing all the photos on my twitter stream, it certainly felt like awesome community was having fun! The excitement was only accentuated by a little surprise I am planning, I so wanna spill the beans cause I am hopeless at secrets! ;)

I had so much fun that I wanna go! Moo and I were already planning on going to Disneyland one day again with the kids; we will just tie it altogether! ;) On further thinking, we are also going to try and get Moo there solo next year pending finances and a ticket which we are already pricing so we can save for it. I’m not quite sure how our family trip will go, we are planning for 2015 but I’m not sure what I will do with the kids while there but we will work it out!

Let me know what your experience of Blizzcon was. I love hearing all the stories! :D


xx Natanie.